The Periodic Table

Birthday strippers, dog depositions, manatee molestation and more!

The goat theme recurs, a Chinese man with a very bizarre hobby, the truth about rural Ireland, and the ultimate Florida story.

A maniacal GPS, a cleaning woman who shouldn't quit her day job, a frank discussion on compassion versus hate and more!

We're back from an unexpectedly long break and we bring you tidings of hardened animal-criminals, pooping Floridians Oompa Loompas and more!

The guys collaborate on a short, but fun episode featuring Chuck E. Cheese riots, naked runners and more, before they take the rest of the year off to enjoy the Christmas holiday with their families.

An overly-picky millionaire, wandering soccer hooligans, Jesus loves darts and more on this weeks Periodic Table.

Possessed teens, marital non-bliss, the healing power of whiskey, and of course dumb criminals make appearances on this week's episode of the Periodic Table.

Eccentric millionaires on the run, Twinkies for Thanksgiving, stubborn apartment-dwellers, drunken farmers and more this week on the Periodic Table!

Jim Beason and Mrs. Opie step in this week to fill in for our regular co-hosts for an episode oddly heavy on bad drivers with some political stupidity, an honorable thief and a bit of nudity thrown in for good measure.

Over-zealous school administrators, cops with nothing better to do, the best performance bonus EVAR and more on this week's pan-global episode of The Periodic Table

Yet another naked Floridian, more beer stories than ever, a haunted car chase, "Dude, where's my car?" and a lot more this weed on the Periodic Table!

Clean criminals, free-falling poultry, Telsa, and Honey Boo Boo picks the president!

Oddly shaped urinals, small-time bank robbers, the ultimate bad waitress, a TSA nightmare and more this week on the Periodic Table.

Our line-up of stories this week includes not one, but two odd animal stow-away stories, an underwhelming superhero, the return of the Sofa King and so much more!

As usual, Florida features nicely in our docket of stories this week, but it's truly a global show featuring a Japanese micro-potty, a New Zealand proctologists nightmare, and something from our Japanese friends that you just have to hear about.

The guys cover the expected slate of weird news stories, but managed to have a couple of serious discussions as well. Don't worry, we promise not to make a habit of it.

This may be our most Florida-heavy episode yet, with a healthy dose of poop and genitals throughout. Seriously folks, we don't make this stuff up!

This week the guys have a laugh over healthy candy bars, try to define art, try to understand the mind of a chicken murderer and more.

This week, Mark Cockrell and Aaron Butler and Shawn Kibel discuss "zero tolerance" policies, crazy nymphos, and of course at least one crazy Floridian.

This week, Mark Cockrell and Aaron Butler and Jim Beason end the Periodic Table hiatus with a show full of weird stuff- some funny, some tragic, but all of it likely to have been missed by your nightly newscast.

This week, Mark Cockrell and Aaron Butler cover the Miami Zombie, a Piggly Wiggly pig, abolishing the UN, handcuffing students and of course, a Mullet Update!

This week, Mark Cockrell, Aaron Butler and Shawn Kibel have perhaps more fun than they should covering topics like gay superheroes, domestic violence, love bites and having way too many cats. We even managed to coin a couple of new terms.

This week, Mark Cockrell, Steve Cherubino and Corey Knapp come together to find that dumb criminals exist all over the world, unicycle riding is better naked, churches will sue you if you tick them off and you shouldn't live with arsonist!

This week, Mark Cockrell, and Aaron Butler enjoy a bevy of funny, thought-provoking, inspiring, enraging and just plain weird news stories from the last week.

This week, Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Chuck Jolley, Corey Knapp and Gordon Lee discuss a series of news stories from around the globe featuring a renegade dentist, drunken babysitters, a black market hero, and more! Plus an updage on the Mullets!

This week, Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Chuck Jolley and Corey Knapp cover another Florida-heavy spate of news stories which should prove instructive to anyone planning a career in the fast food industry.

This week, Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Aaron Butler and Corey Knapp weave through news stories about a courtroom marriage proposal, a drug-dealer's huge package, a very unwelcome Easter prize, and of course Kate Winslet's titanic breasts.

This week, Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Jim Beason and Chuck Jolley come together to talk about NBC's bungling go the Trayvon Martin 911 tapes, a serial parking-lot-pooper, difficult Australian accents, sombrero-clad madmen and more!

This week, Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Jim Beason and Chuck Jolley come together to talk about cancerous lizards, fartless cows, giant sausages, and of course, Amish terrorist. You won't want to miss this one!

This week, Mark Cockrell, Aaron Butler, Kristy Vincent and special guest Jim Beason cover a rage of topics from the sublime to the absurd- and have a really good time doing it. Listen in and join the fun!

This week, Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel and Aaron Butler are joined by "Professor" James Messer for an oddly Florida-centric discussion covering Amish drinking parties, spontaneous taco sauce wrestling, anti-dying laws,and municipal toilet paper shortages.

In a more docile than usual episode, Mark Cockrell and Aaron Butler have a dialog covering medical ethics, dancing robots, running from zombies, and of course, porn. It woun't be an episode of The Periodic Table without porn.

Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Aaron Butler and Chris Neves engage in another wide-ranging discussion about everything from Holocaust deniers, to zombie grandmas, to "butt pumping parties" and more!

Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Aaron Butler and Chris Neves engage in another wide-ranging discussion about everything from Holocaust deniers, to zombie grandmas, to "butt pumping parties" and more!

Mark Cockrell, Eric Fay, Aaron Butler and John Mukulski have a more serious than normal discussion this week, ranging from unions to the Mormon church to abortion and more.

Mark Cockrell, Eric Fay, Aaron Butler and Chris Neves discuss whether porn can be copyrighted, the corruption of the American pharmaceutical industry, stupid people running Homeland Security, women in the military, and much, much more!

Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Aaron Butler and Chris Neves discuss the Superbowl, Demi Moore, Facebook's impending IPO, attempted murder and more this week on the Periodic Table

Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Eric Fay, and Seth Anderson take a look and some of this weeks weirdest and funniest news stories, and of course, get a quick update on the Amish 12.

Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, John Mikulski, and Aaron Butler get together this week to talk about SERIOUS fast-food cravings, SOPA, knowing when to abandon ship, boob-loving NFL fans and more!

Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Eric Fay, Aaron Butler and Seth Anderson cover all the bases in this week's show: Politics? Check. Racism? Check. Drug Use? Check. Male Genitalia? Check? Rogue Amish? Of course!

Mark Cockrell, John Mikulski and Brian Brugger cover racism, welfare reform, the U.S. patents system, and of course, electrocuting kittens.

Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Aaron Butler, Eric Fay, and Zach Hill get together in the waning hours of 2011 to discuss politics, technology, sports, and of course, marijuana.

Merry Christmas from Element Opie Productions

Merry Christmas from Element Opie Productions

This week Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Seth Anderson, John Mikulski and Aaron Butler have a somewhat bizarre conversation covering everything from 80's movies, to tech-savvy nuns, to brain-eating amoeba.

This week Mark Cockrell, Eric Fay, Seth Anderson, John Mikulski, and Aaron Butler discuss everything from upcoming comic book movies, to U.S. tax laws, to how the recession affects drug dealers.

This week Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kible, Zach Hill and Seth Anderson discuss Thanksgiving, baseball, football, a not-so-Amish-Paradise and more!

This week Mark Cockrell, Eric Fay, Aaron Butler and Chris Neves cover turkey cooking tips, comic books, gun control and more!

In our first episode of The Periodic Table Mark Cockrell, Shawn Kibel, Zach Hill and Eric Fay take on the Penn State scandal, the Occupy Wallstreet movement, Boxing vs UFC, the McRib and more!